I am having one of those days where something just spins around in your head over and over and over again. I am having fake conversations in my head, and reliving things in my head, and stuff like that. I hate that I have that happen sometimes. I decided to get on here and write so that I can possibly go to sleep.
I hate my clinical instructor. The first day we worked on the floor she said something about my stomach touching the patients bed. I said something to her about that and how I was suprised that she said that, and she said that she only said it because I was setting off the alarm, and to be careful not to do that so I won't set off the alarm. Okay.
So then she gives me a 15 minute lecture about emptying my patients urine too early in the night - which it doesn't matter, she was just being a bitch. And has since that time come out and said that the time that I originally did it is the time that she wants us to do it - go figure.
Then there is the fact I missed some important things in my care of my patient the next week. So I feel like an idiot for missing a couple of potentially really important things - though they weren't at the time - I just feel like an idiot and I hate feeling that way. Instead of saying, there is a mistake, or you missed it, lets go back and see it, her response it, 'I can't believe you missed that. You aren't critically thinking and you should know this by now' So I just feel like I am being told I am stupid and I hate it.
I don't have patients this week. I am the module leader, which means that I will be helping out all the other students on the floor. So I will be helping to pass out meds, do assessments, change dressings, turn patients, etc. I wonder how she is going to tell me how I suck at it.