The Soloist

Luth got tickets to see the premier for The Soloist with Jamie Foxx and Robert Downing Jr.. It was pretty good. It reminded me of how much I loved going to the symphony with Uncle John when I was a kid. The move was filled with music. I don't really know how to describe the movie, except that it was interesting. I would definately say to go see it in the theater if you can.

You all know me, so of course I cried. I really felt a sense of kinship (not sure if that is the right word) with the main character Nathaniel. There is a part in the movie when he says he doesn't know why the other guy would want to be friends with a person like him.

I know that is how I feel a lot of the time. It has only been changing in the last few years in college that I feel like people know who I am and still want to be friends with me. There is a part of myself that is always afraid that people are going to see the 'real' me and change their mind. Well, I am the real me all of the time. so they obviously like part of me - probably even most of me.

Financial aid and scholarships

Okay, to start off, HOW FREAKING CUTE ARE MY KIDS!!!!

I didn't get pictures taken at the begining of the year, because I figured that since we already had soccer fotos that I wouldn't get more. Well, I ordered class photos and you could get 'personalitly' photos with it, so I thought, what the heck. I love that they both have Moises's eyebrows -exactly the same.

In other news.........

So the past week has been full of paperwork related to money! The priority deadline for financial aid applications was on the 15th. I also decided to apply for a bunch of scholarships that the 'BCC Foundation' offer (rich ex-students who donate money I think) I am not quite sure how the scholarship thing will work out, because it isn't just money given to me, it is specifically given for tuition and books. I already have financial aid that covers that - but it might end sometime next year because of the number of credits I have taken (with this quarter I have more credits at BCC then my AA degree at GRCC!!). So I talked to my grant counselor and she said that I could apply for it and see what happens. I have a hard time talking to her because half the time what she tells me ends up not working out. (like this quarter signing up for an extra class to get my full financial aid amount, only to find out that because the extra class isn't part of the nursing program, they have me as part time, gave me only 75% of the award and charged me for the extra class out of the award amount!!!)

I just want to scream sometimes when it comes to all the paperwork that is involved in getting help! My friend Luth says they make it as hard as possible so you can only get help if you REALLY REALLY want and need it. ARGh!

Well, anyway. We will see what happens with the scholarships. I had to write a few essays, get some letters of recommendation, transcripts, proof of an account with BECU (for the BECU scholarship) and I had to have one of the nursing instructors fill out an extra form for one of the scholarships saying that I am in the program, maintain a gpa over 3.0 and on a scale of 1-10, what does she rate my chances of successfully completing the nursing program (she gave me an 8 - she said, 'you never know if you will fall and brake a bone or something') My instructor who filled out the extra form also told me that I was the only first year student who asked for the scholarship, so I will probably get it! I guess it is true about money being out there and people just needing to apply!

I will know about how my financial aid award with scholarships will turn out by mid June. I expect a good outcome!

Anatomy at Grandma's house

One thing that people who aren't related to me might not know, is that in another life I was probably a hippy who lived on a nudest ranch or something. I don't mind being naked. It isn't a big deal for me, even at this size *gasp* My kids aren't very conservative either, given that they spend their time with me.

Well, most of you have heard the story about Ediths, 'clitornuts' Just the other day, she was taking a shower and she mentioned cleaning her clitornuts. Well, I made the mistake of correcting her and calling it a clitoris, and she got pretty upset at me. How dare I!!

In other news, this morning while we were getting ready to leave for school, Balthezar announces, "Warning! Naked Granpa alert!" Balthezar was sitting in a chair facing the hallway and apparently Dick came out of his bedroom and went to his office in his birthday suit. It was really cute the way that Balthezar said that. He just kind of laughed again when Dick came back from the office to his room, with a silly smirk say warning! again.

I know that I tend to be very northern european in my views about the body. It is just a body. Seeing a naked one isn't that exciting. Of course, I am not quite as free if I am at the gym around 20 year old hardbodies. Then I feel much more self conscious.

Depression

I am having a really hard time right now. I haven't felt this bad since before I started school back when I first came back from Mexico and was living with my mom. I have a test that I haven't really studied for on Monday. I feel like crying all the time. I am having really ugly thougts. I tried to get an appointment with my therapist, but she doesn't have an opening for 2 weeks. I have an appointment with my psychiatrist on thursday - that is just by chance. I made that appointment 3 months ago. I just don't feel like doing this anymore. I am taking my meds, so don't even ask. I am even going outside and going on walks - damn dogs!

the 'Hotel'

Yesterday I took the kids to go see Monsters vs. Aliens. They are on spring break and I wanted to do something special besides going to daycare all day long. I found out that it is playing in 3D and on top of that, it was playing in 3D with IMAX at the new Southcenter theater inside the mall.

We lOVED it. The imax was awesome and the 3D was awesome. I would totally recommend it to everyone. Especially since my kids tend to get bored during movies at the theater. They get antsy, and if it isn't really exciting, get bored.

It was the 2nd time I have been to the mall since it was redone, and the only time I have gone up the escalator to the second or third floor. The kids loved playing on the excalators. I remember loving it as a child, so I feel bad telling them not to! As we were leaving Edith says, "I really like that hotel"